GOP Prez Candidate Campaign Songs Are Here!

we used to have good contest songs; before i was born the dem’s theme tale was “happy days are here again.” they’d sing it at the convention:happy daysare here againthe skies aboveare clear againlet us sing a songof barrack for again!happy days are here again!great song, got the crowd going.the unmixed worst attempt at a competition ado was by the dole crusade; the year he ran against clinton and strayed. some bright mind at his push thought it might be a great idea to change the words of sam and dave’s “i’m a soul man” to “i’m a dole man.”i’m a doooole curb… (da-da-da, d-da-da-da)i’m a doooole man… (da-da-da, d-da-da-da)it was that–profit the dead deer in front of the campaign bus, the fact that he told bigots they were not welcome in the gop, and the factors that he actually tried to beg perot instead of votes–that did him in. the in the cards explore of watching a convention full of overwhelmingly white republicans trying to “get down” to “i’m a dole man” was too much for americans to obverse; they did the straight matters and clinton was re-elected.where are the campaign songs for the current gop crop of losers, you ask? why, they’re right here:”romney egg man”(sing this one to the beatles’ “i am the egg man.” this one’s breed of abstract, match romney’s campaign, lately.)huckabee has you (not me) cause huck has made itall about religionsee how he runs take a shine to god’s solitary sonsee how he climbsi’m dyin’kissing up to cornheadscan’t believe that they’re so dumbwasted all my bankroll–stolid bloody christiansthey compel pick the nomineei empathize with my face grow elongatedromney egg manromney egg curbromney mormon(huck-huck-a-bee!)mister appealing christian, voting–”voting christians, i’m a christian, too-oo-oo!”(”ho-ho-ho, hee-hee-hee, ha-ha-ha!”)see how they run like they think i’m done, see how fly i’m dyin’i'm dyyyy-ingi’m dyin’i'm diiiiiiiiii—ying!”giuliani dance”(sing this to “do you wanna dance,” an old fifties favorite covered by the ramones, i improvise. very romantic, like rudy:)giuliani danceand place into custody their handstell the right you’re their lover blokeoh babe,giuliani dance.giuliani hoof itunder the spotlightyell “nine-eleven” all broad daylight and endlesslyoh baby,giuliani, gambolgiuli-giuli-giuli, giuliani hop!giuli-giuli-giuli, giuliani dance!oh babygiuliani da-ance.giuliani danceto be the nomineeescape your mistresses and fam-i-ly,oh babygiuliani, dance.(here’s john mccain’sanother beatles’ hit”she came in through the bathroom window.”)mccain is through, the bathshit weirdorejected, finished, none too quickly.and now he sucks his thumb and wonderswhy “more war” didn’t compel us swoon. he said he shunned casuistic answershe fundraised 15 bucks a dayhis pro-war presentation sold like cancer–we all knew that it would not simulate.didn’t anybody tell him?didn’t anybody see?money’s only goin’ til sunday,tuesdayinto bankruptcy.oh, yeah…(mike huckabee? he’s goin’ akin to gangbusters, so simply he went with a passionate elvis be aware of:”and marie’s the name (of his latest flame)”:)a very crumbling scamworked delicate today’cause we been calling everyone in town to spread meticulous hatred round huckabee’s my name, bigotry’s my game. mitt talked and talkedand i heard him contemplate that he was christian through and through but my guys said it wasn’t take huckabee’s my name, bigotry’s my game. though he smiled the tears inside were a-withering i wished him luck and then i said goodbye right away he’s gone with no chance of returning guess we were ? la mode to mention plural wives.would you believethat yesterday my name was dogshit in the gop now i’ll be the nominee huckabee’s the name, bigotry’s my game

Simon baker

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